All Because He Loved Me

I must admit that I am quite silly. Though many of you probably already knew this, it came as a revelation to me today as I trudged through my difficult and crazy day. I got up entirely too early (4:30 a.m. to be exact) and went to work. I sleepily made my body perform the necessary tasks. Then, like every crazy morning, Nate and I hurriedly got ready and went to school, the same old packed lunch in hand.

Later, after class, with my head all stuffed with organic chemistry, I headed to the Provo Post Office to finish my passport application. After waiting in line for some time, my turn finally came. We were almost at the end of the application when I asked if it was okay that I hadn't changed my name on my license yet. He said that it most certainly was a problem and sent me to the DMV. I began to be very frustrated because I was trying to squeeze all of this in between classes. I had 45 minutes to finish and get back to class, or at least that was my goal. I ran over to the DMV, and began to get even more cranky as I waited in line once again. The lady working there was super friendly, and I'm afraid I wasn't as friendly back to her as I should've been. Twelve o'clock came and found me paying another fee on top of the ridiculous passport fee I still needed to pay. Updated temporary license in hand, I rushed to class, angrily glaring at all the other drivers on the road. (If you're annoyed at my negativity, please be patient, it gets better).

Changing as quickly as I could into my dance clothes, I managed to get to my contemporary dance class only ten minutes late. A brief break from the chaos, I danced my little heart out. 12:50 and again the craziness. I couldn't get a hold of Nate for our lunch date (which turned out to actually be his phone's fault), so I headed off to the Post Office with a level of grumpiness that was unusual for me. I got there to find that the guy working the passport station was on LUNCH BREAK! Oh man, I was upset. So I read my text book as I waited another 35 minutes. I finally got a hold of Nate, which made me feel slightly better. Once the guy came back, we got the passport application all finished in a mere ten minutes! All that for a ten minute application. Relieved that it was finally over, I headed back to campus for lunch with Nate.


A happy lunch and a nap later, Nate was off to work and I was off to the grocery store. I rolled the windows down in the car and tried to cope with the excruciating heat of summer. I pulled into the parking lot and in I went, thinking I would be out just as fast. But the walls of Walmart are almost like a vacuum, sucking you in and not letting you go. Once I had finally found everything I was looking for in the disorganized chaos, I got in line to check out. This line wasn't too bad, but when I was through and looked at my receipt, I noticed several things were rung up incorrectly. I went back to fix it, but the checkout lady merely sent me to customer service. I got my money back, but I left promising myself that I would never go back to Walmart.

Once I got home and managed to unload everything out of the car, I finally sat down for a second and thought about my crazy day. That's when I remembered something I had read in John Bytheway's book "How to Be Totally Miserable." He points out that miserable people are pros at complaining about their blessings. Thinking about this, I looked around my apartment. Instead of focusing on the fact that it is a little messy or that it has cinder-block walls, I saw that it has a roof, walls, a fridge, a t.v., carpet, a laptop sitting on the table, an internet connection, food in the pantry, a comfortable bed, clothes in the closet, and the list could go on and on. I realized that I was lucky to have an apartment at all!

My perspective began to change, and I saw my day completely differently. I realized that instead of complaining about waking up early, I should have been rejoicing that I have a job. In this economy, especially, that is a huge blessing. Not only that, but Nate is employed as well. And when I came home from work, I should've jumped for joy at finding a sweet husband sleeping adorably; a husband who was willing to wake up and pack my lunch for me as I got ready for school.

Speaking of school, Nate and I both have the opportunity to go to college, and not just any college, we get to attend Brigham Young University. I shouldn't have complained about the passport drama, because I am truly blessed that I even have the means to obtain one, and that I live in a country with a government that provides them. I should've been more grateful for the friendly worker at the DMV, and realized that in a lot of cities, there aren't very many friendly people at all. I should have treasured that sack lunch that I ate today, because there are many people who can't afford peanut butter and jelly to put on their bread. As for the grocery store, at least I have one close by where I can buy healthy food. There are some cities where the closest thing they have to a grocery store is a gas station, and other places where there are no stores, but instead you have to grow and pick and work for every bite of food you eat. Man, I am blessed to have a Walmart, even if it is a pain to shop there sometimes.

What about all those other moments in the day that are almost indescribable because of the joy they bring? Like waking up next to Nate every morning, or learning something new when I'm studying the scriptures. And  how about getting to talk to my mom on a cell phone when she is 40 miles away, almost as if we were standing right next to each other. Even my nerdy moments, like finally figuring out a crazy hard chemistry problem, and finding out that I didn't fail my first o-chem class can bring great joy. What about the moment when Nate lets me take a nap on his lap (being extremely exhausted from my long day) while he works on his dental school application, and listening to him periodically tell me that I'm cute or that he loves me? Or getting my new license that says Kameron A'mee Bushman on it? Oh, and coming home from the grocery store with three bags full of fruit that probably came from all over the world. Yum! Oh yeah, lets not forget AIR CONDITIONING! Man, what on earth was I complaining about again? I almost can't remember...

Once this all hit me, I fell down on me knees and said a prayer of thanks for all of my many blessings. Tears came to my eyes as I remembered my most important blessing, one that all of us have. I realized that if I had nothing else in the whole world except for this one blessing, that would be okay, and everything would work out just fine eternally. This blessing is the Atonement of the Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. With this gift, all of us have the ability to return home to the Father and live eternally in His presence. All we have to do is to never stop fighting the adversary. If we keep fighting, doing our best everyday, we may never be perfect, but we will have given our part, and the Savior of the world can make up for the rest. Now I think, who cares if I had to endure horrible circumstances in this life? It would only last for a moment and then it would be over. Then I could live in peace for eternity, all because my elder Brother loved me enough to die for me. What a sense of hope and power that comes from this knowledge. Why on earth would I complain? I have everything, all because He loved me.